Heart’s Desire

3Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. 4Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. 5Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: 6He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Psalm 3: 3-6 (NIV)

Several years ago when I was taking the Apprentice Writing Course of Christian Writers Guild, one of my assignments was to describe my heart’s desire for my inner spiritual life. As I contemplated this, the Holy Spirit spoke the words of Psalm 37: 3-6 to me.

My desire is for my inner spiritual life to be one of an expectancy that only God can satisfy. I was my life to over-flow with God’s blessings so I can share those blessings with others. I crave an overwhelming hunger and intense thirst for God’s Word. I want a passion for the abiding presence of the Holy Spirit to consume me so He can fill me with joy, peace, and contentment. This will instill in me the confidence that comes from being a chosen daughter of God. I desire a God-given tranquility when life swirls around me in a tornado of turmoil. The outer me will reflect the inner beauty that comes from allowing God’s Spirit to direct my thoughts, desires, and actions. I want my inner spiritual life to permeate my whole being so that people do not see me; they see Jesus. That is my heart’s desire.

© 2008 by Ginny Holcombe. All rights reserved.

When Darkness Comes

In 1956, my older brother and sister would walk me to kindergarten. I remember entering a dark forest, reaching for Pat’s hand, and holding tightly as we journeyed through the towering trees. It seemed like hours before we emerged into the bright sunshine and I would breathe a sigh of relief. As the light dispelled my fear, I no longer needed the reassuring touch so I let go of Pat’s hand. However, she kept me in her sight until I was safely in my classroom.
This childhood experience portrays God’s watch care over me. I blithely go my own way until a dark forest looms before me. It may be a physical, financial, emotional, or spiritual challenge. I cry out to God and reach for His hand to lead me through the darkness. Upon reaching the light of the other side, I let go and skip merrily on, often forgetting to say, “Thank You.” Like my sister, God continues to watch over me. I am His child and He is ever ready for me to reach up and grasp His outstretched hand.
A question arises in my mind. Should I release His hand when life is smooth and pleasant or is it His desire to continually guide and protect me? David answers this in Psalm 139. God knows everything about me. He understands my thoughts (v. 2) and is “intimately acquainted with all my ways” (v. 3). He is everywhere. David states that wherever I go “even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast” (v. 10). I let go; He does not. I must hold fast to His hand through good and evil, triumph and tragedy. I do this by developing an intimate relationship with God through prayer, Bible study, and fellowship with other believers.
As an adult, I realize the dark forest of my childhood was a city park in Valdosta, Georgia. Like my forest, the trials I experience in my life seem immense and frightening. God sees and knows the outcome before I experience the trial. I can trust Him to guide me into the light. As I look back over my life, I see how God uses trials to refine me to create a vessel fit to serve Him. Life is much easier when my hand is in His when the darkness comes.
© 2007 by Ginny Holcombe. All rights reserved

Caterpillar to Butterfly

"Whenever, though, they turn to face God as Moses did, God removes the veil and there they are—face-to-face! They suddenly recognize that God is a living, personal presence, not a piece of chiseled stone. And when God is personally present, a living Spirit, that old, constricting legislation is recognized as obsolete. We're free of it! All of us! Nothing between us and God, our faces shining with the brightness of his face. And so we are transfigured much like the Messiah, our lives gradually becoming brighter and more beautiful as God enters our lives and we become like him."
2 Corinthians 3:17-18

I feel like I have been living like a caterpillar for most of my life; inching along on the ground, seemingly not making much progress but all the while being prepared by God for a beautiful life. The time since my divorce has been my "cocoon" time. I don't know if a caterpillar experiences pain while in the cocoon, but I do know it is confined in a space, limited in what it can do. However, God is at work in the dark tomb creating a beautiful butterfly that will burst forth when the time is right. That is a perfect description of my life right now.
Since the end of my thirty-two year marriage, I have felt so alone. My apartment often feels like a cocoon. It is a place of refuge and shelter; a place for healing and changing; a place where God and I are alone and where He can transform me in His time. This transformation is painful but welcome. I do not want to stay a caterpillar trapped in an earthbound existence. I want to burst forth from my cocoon to soar on gossamer wings. I want to live the beautiful life God purposed for me before I was born.
Butterfly. The sound of this word is light and airy. Butterfly paints a picture of a vibrant creature darting from flower to flower as it gathers and scatters pollen to create more beauty. I desire to be a vibrant creature who gathers God's love until it overflows and spills onto the lives of earth-bound caterpillars creating in them the potential to emerge from their cocoon as beautiful butterflies. They touch the lives of other caterpillars.
This part of God's creation is a beautiful portrayal of His redeeming work in His children. We begin our lives as caterpillars bound to this world by our sin. The process of conviction, repentance, and acceptance of Jesus Christ as Savior begins our time in God's cocoon of restoration. He shapes and molds us through circumstances and trials until we emerge as a lovely butterfly and begin the joyful journey that will be completed one day when we enter His presence.

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright ? 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group."

© 2008 by Ginny Holcombe. All rights reserved.